'Hey ! Your outfit's rocking ! Awesome haircut ! You rock ! She's cool !' - I sometimes wonder where my daughter learnt this thought-provoking, inspiring vocabulary from ? This seems to have such an astounding range of applicability, that it can describe almost everything that needs description. I listen to it in the same tone, same voice modulation and same enthusiasm (of course referring to about 150 different things) all day. I have gently tried offering options, ' just to provide some variety', but I was told that they were 'really not necessary'. Anything and everything can be 'rocking' and 'awesome'. Why bother with other words ? They just confuse issues. Life should be simple.
I asked myself, where did she pick this from ? Stupid question. She listens to it all the time. Its hitting her eardrums 24 x 7. She imbibes it so naturally. Had I forgotten that we evolved from monkeys ? Copying comes to us naturally.
Try giving instructions to your child and try just doing what you want done yourself. What do you think will work ? Obviously the latter ! We are awful at receiving instructions. Worse still at executing them. Children of course have the mental make-up which interprets an instruction as 'Firstly does this sentence start with 'dont' ? That means 'Do'. Or wait. Does this sentence start with 'Do ?' Ah, that means 'Dont'.' A teenager looks at a 'dont' sentence with a gleam of challenge in his eyes. 'Dont' to him, most certainly means 'must try and see what happens' !
A two-year-old is no different. Somehow 'No' gets converted to 'Yes, it must be experimented with' in the inbox of his brain !
So what should a parent do ?
Simple. Just do yourself what you want done. Quietly. Watch it being observed. Now the child's mind says 'Why am I not being told to do this ? Why is she doing it ? It must be fun. I should also do it.'
Job done. Mission accomplished.
So, Monkey Lesson No. 1 : 'Do. Make no issue of it. Watch it being emulated.'
The most painless way of getting your point across. Works for any age group.
1 comment:
That was surely an angry monkey and exceptions prove the rule. You have delved into a very interesting and most complicated part of humans....behavior and this in terms of words and action. Every moment is a learning experience and I wish that I could remain mentally young to :
a. Not suffer from pre conceived notions.
b. Have an open tolerant mind
c. Understand that anybody and everybody may affect my life in some way and I cannot predict that.
d. Do for others, without expecting something in return.
Hope your endeavour brings value to all. Keep writing.
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